SCP-329-J

Prompt

You: Good morning three two nine dash jay. SCP-329-J: I am the ghoooost siiiign! You: Um… ok. SCP-329-J: Yield to oncoming traffiiic! Ooooooh! You: Um, ghost sign, do you know where you are? SCP-329-J: I'm in the realm of the liviiiing! Oooooooooooh! You: Right, um, what were you doing before this? SCP-329-J: I was a siiiign! Now I'm a ghoooooost siiiiign! You: What does that even mean? SCP-329-J: I was once arrested for driving under the influuuueeence! You: What? SCP-329-J: I know riiiight? I don't even have leeeeegggssss! Ooooooh! Drunk driving is dangeroooouuuus! You: Good morning, er, ghost sign. SCP-329-J: Don't call me thaaaat! I'm just a siiiign noooow! Ooo- I mean, hiiiii! You: Why are you a sign now? SCP-329-J: I dropped my ghooooost liceeeeense! You: Your what? SCP-329-J: I can't be a ghoooost without my ghooooost liceeeense! You: But how can you even carry a license? SCP-329-J: Well I can't noooow! I'm no longer a ghooooost! You: I…. but…. what? You: We've brought you outside to see if you affect traffic in an anomalous way. SCP-329-J: It's nippyyyy! Can I have a sweeeattteerr? You: No! For fuck's sake, you're a ghost! You don't need a sweater! Shut up! SCP-329-J: Yoooouuuu shut uuuup! You: WHY DON'T YOU MAKE ANY SENSE!?